This is the big one
I thought I’d already lived my moment of truth but I was not even close.
An honest appraisal of how my mind and body are coping
When you’re one hundred percent focused on an outcome and you’ve invested every last resource you possess to achieve it, when you simply must get the job done no matter what, it’s easy to overlook how your mind and body are holding up under the pressure.
The reality for me right now is that I am physically, mentally and emotionally fatigued.
This week I recognised that my standards have slipped and my efforts have been uncharacteristically inconsistent – an indication that I am losing focus at a time when I most need to be at the top of my game! If I am to finish my 2011 competition campaign with as much ferocity and energy that I vowed to invest nine months ago I must honestly acknowledge how my mind and body are holding up to this intensity and pressure I have imposed on myself. And I must reignite my drive and commitment for the lead-up to the toughest contest on the calendar.
Scrutinising my commitment
When I examined my efforts this week, I arrived at the following realisations.
I am mentally, emotionally and physically exhausted. I have been at this for 41 weeks, 287 days, perpetually, relentlessly, incessantly. My body hurts. My mind is screaming for a break from the intense self-imposed pressure.
But I cannot give up, that is not an option. I must tenaciously override the urge to lessen my intensity. The choice is clear cut and I must be brutally honest when asking the questions that challenge my current mindset. Am I in or out? Am I 100% committed to finishing what I started? If I am only 99% committed, that is not good enough.
Less than 100% commitment = no commitment.
Regaining focus and recommitting
Achieving my outcome, top three in the world, is now an hour-by-hour proposition. Every thought, action, belief, rule and standard will have a systematic effect on how I look and feel on that world stage in seven days time.
At this time when I am the most vulnerable to giving in I must be my strongest. When I am the most depleted of energy and nutrients, I must present the best physique that is humanly possible. This is undoubtedly a sport of extremes. My mind is the sole source of drive and energy now, and what a powerful and unstoppable force this can be when we choose to use it!
I am in my own head now. Nothing that anybody says (opinions, feedback positive or negative) will have any bearing on the certainty and confidence I have in the strategies I have chosen and committed to that will take me to my ultimate destination.
To achieve anything worthwhile is risky
Disclosing my goal to the world – to you – puts me in a vulnerable position. I am revealing a very personal drive as well as taking the risk of failing to achieve my goal publicly. But doing this adds another layer to my commitment.
I will do whatever I have to.
It is that important to me.
